Couple Leaves Church, citing lack of quality coffee

BABBLERS PRESS - It wasn't poor preaching or sloppy worship that caused one local couple to start looking elsewhere for a new church home. It was the consistent lack of quality coffee being dished out from the church kitchen. 

"It's like the preacher said in a sermon not too long ago," said the man. "Many people are pursuing a decaffeinated Christianity that won't perk you up or lift you up. But it's worse than that here. The teaching is fine and the people are wonderful but the coffee stinks." 

The man's wife added that she was often frustrated by the lack of cream and sugar. "I don't know whose job it is to ensure the coffee supplies are adequately stocked but whoever it is they're failing miserably," she said. The woman added that the church should stop majoring on the minors and start thinking about what's really important.

"At the end of the day, does it really matter if the sermon is scriptural, or if the worship is done in a way that pleases God?" she said. "I mean, just look at Tim Horton's. They don't preach. They don't worship. But they serve excellent coffee and tasty donuts and the place is always packed. Duh." ​