"What does this babbler want to say?" - Acts 17:18
"What does this babbler want to say?" - Acts 17:18
BABBLERS PRESS - "Nobody is perfect" has become the mantra of one local man who occasionally indulges in internet porn, looks lustfully at women, cheats on his tax returns, and sometimes lies to get himself out of a jam.
"I make mistakes, just like everybody else," he admitted. "But I'm still a pretty good guy. There was only one perfect Person and look what they did to Him."
Despite acknowledging the crucifixion of the sinless Son of God, the man still doesn't see the need to accept Jesus personally.
"I go to church when I have nothing better to do," explained the man. "I've never killed anybody. I don't intentionally hurt other people. In fact, I try to help them when I can. So I don't really see what the problem is."
Upon hearing an explanation of the the gospel including the fact that all men are sinners who deserve death the man simply shrugged his shoulders and repeated his original argument.
"Well, like I said before, nobody is perfect," he concluded.
BABBLERS PRESS - Thinking marriage would cure his tendency to be attracted to members of the opposite sex, one Christian man now finds himself in a place of great disillusionment.
"When I see a beautiful woman walk past me I'm still tempted to turn my head and look at her, " lamented the man. "I find her attractive even though she's not my wife. What's wrong with me? Am I a pervert or something?"
A noted Christian counsellor said it's not uncommon for Christian men, even married ones, to retain some level of sexual desire toward attractive women in general, even after they've committed their lives to Christ. For some, the attraction even increases.
One self-professed heterosexual explained that he was depressed when he became a Christian and as the depression lifted his basic desires and appetites seemed to come alive, including his sexual appetite. "This was deeply disturbing to me at first," said the man. "I thought sex was basically an evil thing, something to be repressed, certainly not expressed or experienced."
Through much counselling, the formerly depressed Christian learned that sexual desire is a God-given desire. "It's not evil in and of itself," he said. "Being attracted to women is not perverted, it's actually normal."
Meanwhile, the counsellor did caution that sexual desire, like any natural desire, needs to be subject to proper restraints. "The only biblically sanctioned expression of sexual desire is within the bonds of matrimony," he concluded.
BABBLERS PRESS - Representatives from various groups of humans have released a joint statement saying they see no reason to abandon their long-held belief in their own inherent goodness, despite numerous reports of people "doing bad things all over the globe."
The statement read in part: "We still believe humans are basically good. There's no credible evidence to suggest that we inherited a sinful nature from our first parents, Adam and Eve, and that we need to overcome our sinful tendencies by accepting Jesus Christ as our personal Saviour and Lord."
The statement ended with an offer of condolences to the 17 victims who were recently gunned down in a high school in Parkland, Florida. The writer of the statement admitted that he doesn't watch the news much "because it's too depressing."
Meanwhile, another representative for the group said they are still working on an explanation for human wickedness and sin. "We're trying to figure out why inherently good people continue to do things that are anything but good," she said. "There are still reports of murders, thefts, sexual assaults and rapes occurring throughout the world. We can't really explain all that from the standpoint of our current world-view but we're working on it."
The representative did say they are investigating recent scientific studies that suggest human evil may be caused by eating too much sugar and/or processed foods like bologna and bacon.
BABBLERS PRESS - Creation itself was still fresh out of the womb when Satan made a shocking statement that some now consider to be a bold faced lie. God had placed the earth's first couple, Adam and Eve, in His newly created garden, the illustrious Garden of Eden.
The garden contained several trees which provided food for the newlyweds. They could eat fruit from all the trees except one, the tree of the knowledge of good and evil. Eating from that particular tree was punishable by death. At least that's what God told them.
But Satan countered God's claim with the following bold statement: "You will not surely die." However, thousands of years of human history has now confirmed that Satan was indeed lying. Since that fateful day billions of people have perished.
"You can't travel very far in this world without seeing cemeteries," said one eye witness. "They're pretty much in every city and town." Sources have confirmed that these cemeteries, also called graveyards, are inhabited exclusively by dead people.
Daily news reports also confirm the reality of death. As one daily news watcher said: "Every day there are reports of people who stop breathing and become lifeless," he said. "Sometimes it's because somebody shot them, stuck them with a knife, blew them up or ran over them with a truck."
One insightful person said "it makes you wonder if you can really believe anything Satan says. He was obviously wrong about the death thing. Perhaps he's wrong about other things too."
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